How do I come to know BEING is, that God is?
Let us hold onto rather firmly to the disconstruction from my naivete engrossment with the natural and through that gaining a vision of the world as a TEXT , the most inclusive one at that.
It is a vision that has been lurking in my bosom and now through hermeneutic efforts of my own I have made it shine forth and determine my vision , how I see the world. It is NOT an invention or a construction of my own. I cannot simply invent or construct visions. I have not learned it from the Vedas or the Agamas or any other scripture, for visions cannot be learned this way. It has been there all along within me as the cuukkumam, the unrealized and now become a tuulam, the manifest.
In this I see that it is entirely out of my own efforts that I accomplish this. My studies of philosophical and religious literature and so forth may just help but do not by themselves bring it about. I have to REFLECT metaphysically and spend tremendous amount of psychic energy to gain this vision. It is a heroic effort of a kind .
In this I notice that I must have a metaphysical courage, the courage to continuously free myself from all the fishing nets of traditional thinking that would like to capture myself and imprison me in their traditional lores and through that give me an identity -- a man of this gotra , of this caste, of this sect, of this religion, of this ideology, of this symbolic marks and thousands of such others . I can know them but must NOT allow them to trap myself and imprison me. I must FREE myself from them and become PURE in order to gain this vision and be in it. When i succumb to their pulls I become dirtied, a man operating under various kinds of prejudices.
They want to cheat themselves by the largeness of the number of adherents as if that constitutes the criteria of TRUTH without realizing that TRUTH has nothing to do with number, there may be TRUTH but not owned even by a single individual.
And when I can gain this vision and get engrossed in it, then I notice that it points beyond itself to a DEEP STRUCTURE, just as the face of my beloved would go beyond itself and point towards her heart. There is the being of BEING as that which enpresents the World as such. The BEING here is not Heideggerian Being , the way of being of the the humans, existence, the Da-Sein ( if I have understood it properly) but rather the metaphysical substance that remains the Causative Ground for all that is, exists or has being, the Civam where " ci ' means being-there-as such, thrusting itself out as -there out of an absence of presence, being covered up from showing itself as there.
With this understanding firmly established, the WORLD ceases to be pure physical and becomes immensely spiritual. And along with it , I cease to be a materialist or even a Marxist or a secularist of whatever kind. The BEING being-there is a TRUTH that I cannot deny it. I have not been deluded into it as I gained this understanding all by myself through disconstructive efforts of my own. The World as a TEXT is a vision that I can gain again and again , get engrossed in it and through that SEE the presence of BEING, BEING being-there as the world and as responsible for all that transpires there.
And in this I notice that I am NOT the maker of myself, of what I am --- I am shaped, constituted, formed etc, i.e there is an authorship for my being in the world as such and such. My little authorship is itself a miniscule of a large authorship; I am an author only because BEING is an AUTHOR. Thus in my being-there-in the -world , there is already being-there of BEING but somehow concealed from me until I effect all these disconstructions and gain these visions!
Hence I am moved to say : I exist , therefore BEING is. (Tamil: naan vaazkinReen, athanaal iRaivan irukkinRaan)
But in saying thus, am I reasoning something like Descartes: Cogito ergo sum?
No, it does not appease to be so. I am NOT reasoning at all. The presence of BEING slowly DAWNS in my understanding as I hold on to the vision that the WORLD is a TEXT. The presence of BEING is a disclosure , a revelation, a showing up for me to see and which may not necessarily happen. Nevertheless when it happens, it happens and when I see this aspect of it , I am moved to say it is an aruL of BEING, a gift, a blessing that for some reason or other BEING sees I deserve.
And that is what I articulate in a formulaic manner : I exist , therefore BEING is. In my existence and in the intricate dramas that unfold there , the presence of BEING is cognised.
I cannot from henceforth, be but a THEIST, one who sees BEING as God in order to maintain myself forever in His presence, wants to be continuously a recipient of HIS Grace, the AruL.
ULLAGANAR
( editing and re-paragraphing by his student )
( picture taken from https://upliftconnect.com/existence-of-god/ with thanks )
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